Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Release, Rinse and Receive

Good Tuesday morning! I hope you're having a great week. Yesterday in my yoga class, I found myself feeling a little weak, but not in a physical way. We did a lot of heart openers and a lot of twists for rinsing out our bodies. I tend to keep a lot of energies and stresses in my stomach. Every time I do heart openers, I can feel the energy pouring out. For all of you who do not do yoga, I swear, I never in my life thought I would be saying these things. But, in yoga you can literally move the energy that is within you. When you hold your stress, your anxieties, fears and even joy, love, passion, etc. I think sometimes I get very, very fearful of letting go of things-- of releasing messages that I used as defining characteristics about myself. A few years ago, I built up a lot of layers around me and within me. Terrified of any sort of vulnerability I held onto these layers for a pretty long time. I guess starting about three years ago, I began letting go of them and as I began to "feel again," it was almost like coming out of hiding. Well, yesterday I had another one of those moments. As I changed poses from tree, to camel, to a wheel, I was quivering and feeling like I needed to go into child's pose. The sweat poured off of me and I could hear the rain outside on the windows, I felt myself let go a little bit more and vowed to stay open, even as I was shaking. Sometimes, it's very hard to stay open, to release and let go of any old definitions of ourselves. But, it's necessary. Necessary for growth, renewal and well being... although I have to say when you are used to certain thoughts in your head they almost become comforting, but it's nice when you realize they aren't working for you anymore. If you are taking up space with old patterns, you don't really have space to receive. So, rinse out, release and renew...

Don't hold on so much.

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