“Live your life from your heart. Share from your heart. And your story will touch and heal people's souls.” -Melody Beattie
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Brr, it is cold outside. Or perhaps living in Houston for the past two years, where 70 degrees is chilly and 65 is freezing, has made me a wimp when it comes to cooler weather. Needless to say, I am wishing all of my sweaters weren't in Colorado and feel like I might need to move them from there as soon as possible, because in Arkansas, well, I'm thinking I might need them. It has been very hard for me to believe that I am actually moving out of Houston. It feels weird to say it, and I am sure tears will be shed when I start really packing up my apartment. This has been an extremely hard decision for me, whether to stay or go, be here or there, and it seems that no one has been able to give me an answer for what I should or shouldn't do, so I kinda just made some decisions and now I am going to hope for the best. The thing I will miss most about Houston, is my yoga studio. But, I have found a place to lease up in Fayetteville, and am planning on making that a very humble, little yoga studio for anyone and everyone who wants to do some yoga. However, I am scared. Really scared. My studio in Houston, became my home and I very much feel like it will always be my second home. I am a teacher there, and definitely feel a sense of connection to myself and to others there that I have never experienced before. It's a place that in a lot of ways did a lot of healing for me or perhaps, I did a lot of healing there. Arkansas, has always been a place where I've been a kid. No one knows me here really as a writer or a yoga teacher, it's kinda like I'm starting all over again, as I have many times, but this time, this time, I will actually miss a place that I am leaving, very much. I have moved many times. I went to college in Colorado, and moved from there to New York, New York to Dallas, Dallas to Houston. Houston, somehow, very unexpectedly, carved its way into my heart. Yes, it's hot. Yes, the traffic isn't great. Yes, it's a big city. But, I think any place where you grow, heal and come into yourself, that place will always hold a special spot within. I think maybe, we all have them. My reasons for moving though stacked up... proximity to family, cost of living, wanting to move out of an apartment (because I've lived in one for the past 7 years)... and I don't know, I think a part of me wants a challenge. I took a long break after living in New York. I haven't really been committed or connected to anything, except, yoga in Houston. But, I've found myself wanting to place some roots, somewhere! Perhaps, a yoga studio is enough to stay for, but it seems that certain things in my life have unfolded leading me to a house and yoga space in Arkansas. Who knows, if I will stay in Arkansas forever. I have no idea, but I think if I didn't try it, I would always wonder about it. All I can do is bundle up and go for it.
I hope all of you have a very happy Tuesday!
I'll let you know if I freak out and change my mind. :)